Grahamaloo

This whole "I don't get to be the baby anymore" thing has not been very easy on Graham.  He went from being happy go lucky, mellow fellow into grumpy.  always grumpy.  Graham and me are pretty tight.  We just kind of need each other.  He would have been a perfect "last baby".  But he's not a last baby and he only got to be the baby for 17 months.  For his little personality, that was rough!  One day when Leah was about 8 weeks old my mom came down to watch the kids so I could go to an herbs class.  I came running out of the bedroom in a hurry to leave and plowed right into Graham.  Smack went his little head right on the wood floor.  Oh how he cried and oh how bad I felt.  Fast forward to that afternoon.  I had gotten home and my mom had left.  I was out on the patio nursing Leah while the boys played.  Graham came over to me and climbed up in the chair with me - I realized that he had poopy pants and not too much of it was being contained by his diaper - it was all over!  I hurried to stand up and get him off of Leah (who he had climbed on top of, who I was still nursing mind you) and in the process made the chair become unbalanced and tip over.  Somehow, Grahams little hand got caught under the chair and when it hit the patio two of his little fingernails got ripped right off.  off.  seriously.  It was heart breaking.  I quickly laid down Leah - who immediately began screaming, so I could pick up Graham- who was screaming - and there was blood and poop everywhere.  I ran inside in a crazy frenzy not sure which liquid to clean up first!  Clara was a rock star - she took care of Leah all afternoon while I rocked and rocked my sad baby boy.  That night as I put him to bed I lay down with him in the recliner in the nursery and cried and cried and cried.  I missed my baby so much!  I felt like i'd had to let go of him and I hardly even ever got to hold him anymore - and now I had been the cause of even more pain and hurt and I just missed him so much I could hardly stand it.  I know our Leah came to us when she was supposed to - but having a newborn with a 1 year old is not always easy.  I just missed him so much.  I held him for a few hours that night.  Until my other baby woke up and needed me.  And then I cried some more that Graham couldn't have all of me anymore.  He's doing a lot better. And some days I see happy go lucky Graham again.  I know now it probably has more to do with his age that with his birth-place.  He's almost two for heaven's sakes and being two is kinda rough sometimes.  He is a sweet boy though - he is actually pretty dang hilarious and I love him so much it hurts. 

 This day I thought he was being so sweet with the little chicks - carrying them all around so careful - until.... he held one a little too tight and he dropped a little dead bird at my feet.  No kidding.  I about cried and then slowly it's little head rolled around and it's eyes opened up.  Not dead - just squeezed a little too tight - whew!!!

 He found a whole lovely pack of Clara's lipgloss one day.  It was super cool.  That same day my awesome rainbow vac cleaned up all this lipgloss, pee, and an entire bag of purple frosting that had been mushed into the stairs.  not a bad days work.

 One day Graham was looking out the window and pointing out all of the things he saw to Clara.  Car!  yep - there's a car she'd say, Bird!  yep - a bird too.  Tree!  uh-huh.  She looked over at me with a look of being completely smitten and said so sincerely, "Can we keep him forever? I just love him so much!"   Melted  - I was completely melted.  Yes!  Yes we can keep him forever!  Because you have an older Brother that loved you so much He gave his life for you - you get to have that darling baby brother be with you forever. No matter what.   Being a parent has made me a hundred times more grateful for the gospel.  I'm so thankful for these truths I can teach to my children every day.  We are so lucky.

 Graham has the best thighs I think I've ever seen.  He goes pant-less a lot.  With those legs though - I can't see who would blame him.  

 He just needed a teaspoon of onion.  It's pretty obvious Graham loves food.  He could eat ALL DAY. No joke.  It makes me a little worried sometimes.  But also he just really loves being in the kitchen with me.  He already empty's the silverware from the dishwasher, helps put away the tupperware, and can help himself to just about anything he wants from the fridge, pantry or dishwasher with a good hard yank and the help of a chair.  Yesterday he got himself down a peach and a butcher knife out of the drawer.  He then dropped the knife on his toe and cried for a half an hour.  What am I gonna do with him.....my other two were almost three before they realized they had the power to open up the fridge themselves.  I love this goof ball - but let's hope I can do a little better job of keeping him safe!